


Real

by A_tiny_star_prince



Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: (just for a bit-), Angst, Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders Angst, Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders Has ADHD, Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders Has Self-Esteem Issues, Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders Needs a Hug, Hurt/Comfort, I added Logan cause I needed it., Insomnia, M/M, Nonverbal Roman Sanders, Roman needs some sleep honestly, Wrote this on the fly at like midnight, don’t we all tho-, more tags may be added, so no beta, sorry - Freeform, vent - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-09
Updated: 2020-12-09
Packaged: 2021-03-09 18:47:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,199
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27971039
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/A_tiny_star_prince/pseuds/A_tiny_star_prince
Summary: Why does it get dark so soon here?Romans room is cold.Getting out of bed is hard.
Relationships: Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders & Everyone, Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders/Logic | Logan Sanders
Comments: 4
Kudos: 76





	Real

**Author's Note:**

> Sorry in advance, this may be good, may be bad, it’s gonna be weird-
> 
> I wrote this at 12am when I couldn’t sleep and the next day I finished it and stuff so feel free to point out my spelling errors-

It got dark early. Really early. Early enough that Roman wondered if he’d lost track of time when he glanced outside, imagining to see the sun setting at 5:30pm, only to stare at a pitch black world.   
  
Something about it... the lack of light... the dark... kept him there. Staring. Staring outside in the dark.   
  


That’s what he did now. It was quiet. The only sound was a faint buzzing in his ear, static noise, he swore he was imagining it. The rustle of his hands against the fabric of his sheets. He could hear himself blink.   
  


It was warm too. The room was cold, it always was, but his bed was warm. He could feel it. Head halfway on a pillow, chin on his stuffed animal. His torso twisted, covers warm, his foot cold against his leg, his throat dry.   
  


He couldn’t sleep. He went to bed an hour ago. More. Longer. Less. Did it matter? The point... the point was that it was late. Very late.   
  


He closed his eyes.   
  


He opened them again moments later, the bags under his eyes aching.   
  


What was this....? Was this normal? To hear songs floating through his head, to hear nothing, to feel dry and tired and warm, to be so tired and so... awake?

Maybe. Maybe not. Who was he to know.   
  


How unprincely, not knowing.

He hoped Patton didn’t see him like this.

He closed his eyes again.

He hoped he’d sleep this time. 

Hope, it seemed, was fickle. Roman tossed and turned and sat up when he felt like he couldn’t do anything else. He turned on a light, reaching up blindly to feel the familiar knob of the lamp on his bedside table, hearing the *click!* of the lamp, as light spilled across his rosey-red and white sheets, and a static hum filled the air.   
  
Roman stared at the sheets, licking his dry lips. He didn’t know how long he stared, focused on the static of the light bulb and the tiredness dragging across his eyes and under them, and yet focused on nothing at all. He didn’t know why, but it felt fake.   
  


Virgil always mentioned having existential crises- but Roman wasn’t sure if this was quite the same.   
  


It felt fake. It felt wrong. It felt real. It wasn’t. He wasn’t. But he was, wasn’t he? But why him- why these eyes, why could he see- why could he hear this- was it different if he was one of the others? He wouldn’t even be him then, would he- he’d be someone else- he didn’t know if he’d realise that or not. If his mind moved, if he looked like them, would he hear like them? Or would he smell like them- or would he not change at all, was it all in his head-?   
  


What did Janus think when he smelled chocolate?What did Patton think when he hummed during breakfast?What did Logan see when he imagined the stars? What did Remus feel when he heard a song on the radio- 

What was he doing here?

Roman swallowed. He glanced up, blinking slowly. His room.

The sheets felt warm against his legs. He didn’t notice till now. The space was bright. Brighter than he thought. Or was it darker? 

Roman moved, pushing the covers off and standing, quiet. The humming was quiet, less invasive. He paused there, unsure why he’d stood in the first place. Instinct? Mindlessness?

He found himself in front of the mirror. Staring at his reflection, eyes tracing the marks on his face- he was touching the little bags under his eyes before he realised, pausing.   
  


When did he get here?

~~~

Logan roused to the sound of someone knocking on his door, fumbling as he placed his glasses on.

”Yes?” He asked, sitting up and turning his side-lamp on, stumbling blearily to the door, rubbing sleep out of his eyes.

He paused, mouth open to speak, when he saw Roman. A frown formed on his face and he gave the exhausted Prince a glance-over, noting the empty and tired look behind his dull eyes.

”Roman?” He asked, voice morphing into something softer, something caring.

Roman didn’t meet his eyes, staring at the others socks, mentally counting the stars, somewhere in his mind. He just gave a small movement, a shrug of kinds, glancing away at the carpet before focusing on the navy blue and silver.

Logan’s brows furrowed. “Another one?” He prodded, curious and gentle. His hand reached out to guide Roman inside the room, feeling how cold his shirt was. Not a nightmare then, or he’d be warm from sleeping, or even clammy- but no. Cold. Dull. He was awake... and not in bed.

The ended up on the bed, Logan sitting beside Roman, an arm wrapped around his shoulder. “Ro?” He asked, scanning his face.

Roman gave a tired hum, eyes finally looking up at the other, green eyes lacking the sparkle of mischief and energy they held only a dozen or so hours before.

Logan smiled softly, care filling his brown eyes. “There you are,” he murmured, other hand reaching to cup Romans cheek. “Wanna talk?” He asked gently, smile warming when the tired man nuzzled into his touch.

The shaking of the prince’s hand didn’t bother Logan much. The bespectacled man nodded, thumb stroking Roman’s cheek gently, warming the chilled skin.

”Alright then, want to lie with me?” He offered in a soft tone, tilting his head to look at the others eyes, gaze kind and soft.

Roman nodded, and Logan could have cheered, if he didn’t know much much the other needed the rest. He manoeuvred them around the bed, murmuring a soft apology when he had to retract his hand and heard Roman’s sad little hum at the loss.

They ended up with Logan cradling Romans’s head to his collar, enough to rest his chin on if he so wanted, an arm around the prince and the other back to cupping his face. Their legs were tangled comfortably, covers pulled up around them, light off.

Logan smiled down at Roman, chuckling softly at a small yawn that escaped the drowsy man. Pressing a gentle kiss to his brow, he continued his gentle touches as Roman slowly dozed off, eyes fluttering closed.

Logan waited a few moments before he too closed his eyes, sure the other would stay asleep.

The next morning, they would talk about it. About why Roman couldn’t sleep, about why he didn’t know why he was moving, about all of it. The next morning, they would eat breakfast and Logan would bring Roman to the couch, quoting that “you need at minimum nine hours of rest to preform efficiently-“ while he covered them in a fluffy blanket and settled Roman against his chest, words too soft to be heard and warmth filling their little world on the couch. In the morning, Roman would talk, quieter than usual, until coaxed back to his usual volume.

In the morning it would be different.

But for now, Logan would hold Roman as the prince slept for the first time in hours. For now, they would rest, safe, and together. Warm. Alive.

Real. 

**Author's Note:**

> Well- hope you liked it-   
> Again, feel free to point out all the spelling errors I managed to make and then miss when I gave this a once-over,,,
> 
> I will work on updating the other stuff I have but current life stuff has kinda gotten in the way of updating, so until o sort a few things out, I can’t post the next Chapter of The Split 2.0- sorry. 
> 
> Until next time! :)


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